Japanese Coast Guard Considering Re-Employing Retirees

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“Here come the Chinese” (Picture: FueledByCoffee)

In an idea clearly stolen from the recent movie Battleship, the Japanese Coast Guard is considering using end-of-life patrol vessels and re-employing retired officers to help them deal with increased patrols around the disputed Senkaku/Diaoyu Islands. A perfect plan that will not only provide surveillance in the region, but also insult the Chinese Navy’s competence by sending a bunch of old men on rusty buckets to face them.

A senior Coast Guard official admitted to Jiji Press that the current organisational structure was “unable to deal with the situation in the long term.” The fact that two of the most powerful nations on earth are expected to continue their silly game of chicken ‘in the long term’ rather than open up a dialogue should be the real news here, but apparently everyone just accepts that.

It’s not yet been reported whether Coast Guard officials already prepared for land invasions by laying booby traps all around the islands after watching Home Alone at Christmas.

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