You may have recently seen this fantastic GIF of Christiano Ronaldo looking uncomfortable as a Japanese TV presenter wiggled some strange winged device with his mouth:
What you may not have realised is that the weird mouth-wiggling wings weren’t part of some kind of Japanese game show challenge, but a product that Ronaldo is endorsing. A product which apparently strengthens your cheek muscles (have you been wondering why you can’t seem to find a nice boyfriend/girlfriend? It’s probably because of your pathetic, doughy cheek muscles).
As if the TV appearance wasn’t humiliating enough, the current Ballon d’or holder has now appeared in this jolly little commercial for the Facial Fitness Pao – which is a steal at just ￥13,824 ($138). Notice that at no point does Ronaldo put the device anywhere near his mouth.
Try not to have nightmares about the Patrick Bateman-esque laugh he gives at the end…