Pizza Chocolate is Here, World Somehow Doesn’t Descend into Chaos


Over the weekend it came to our attention that pizza chocolate is a thing that actually exists now. In the name of journalistic integrity, we considered grabbing some from the convenience store and giving it a try. But then we came to our senses, threw our heads back and guffawed at the very idea of even going near pizza chocolate – especially considering it was Pantsless Saturday and the convenience store was like a whole block away, but also, you know, pizza chocolate.


Lacking an intern to send out (you can totally be our intern if you want, by the way) and try this obviously horrible concoction, we scoured the Japanese Interwebs for reviews of the product. Where we half expected to find the crazed ramblings of those that had tried the chocolate and somehow lived to tell the tale, we mostly pulled up reviews touching on how utterly wrong and terrible it is.

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The chocolates apparently taste so uncannily like pizza wrapped in white chocolate that the product’s very existence defies all logic. Also, for some reason, the pizza flavor comes from a cracker wedged into the center of the chocolate. We presume in some boardroom at manufacturer Tirol, there’s a guy in a diaper, smeared in peanut butter, laughing and flapping his lips at the very idea that we’re even talking about this at all.

Photos via Choco Labo

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